Monday, October 3, 2011

Ever have one of them days??

Did you ever have one of those days where you could eat the house if they let you lol yea right let’s not try that my banded friends.  But I seriously felt wide open this past weekend and wow on Saturday I was having a tough time curbing my cravings.  I don’t really know what triggered them but they were trying to take over!  I didn’t allow myself to give in I just kept walking away from the kitchen telling myself I didn’t want to do it. It’s a total mind game .. I swear I’m not crazy but I do talk to myself when food is involved.   I don’t have anything in the house that would allow me to cheat but during my walk Saturday night I walked by a bakery … and I heard it calling me taunting me to come in but I didn’t.  I’m not to the point where I’ve allowed myself to cheat on sweets, I honestly don’t think I’m strong enough not go back to my old habits.  They say (the elder bandsters) to feed the craving but what happens if you don’t have the will to stop?  What happens if you’re the type of person that will fuel the craving? What if one just isn’t enough and hubby finds me on the street corner like one of them junkies on TV overdosing on a box of doughnuts (of course I’m exaggerating, maybe lol) ... I know one day I will treat myself but for right now I just can’t do it.  It’s so hard to just say no.  In the mean time I will just dwell in my day dream of a glazed doughnut..who knows if it will even go down but hey a girl can dream.  
What do you all do to curb your cravings?

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

My Story

I guess I should tell you a little of my story ...

I have always struggled with my weight never to the extent of 252 pounds but that weight just crept up on me.  I never even seen it coming.  It was like I woke up one day and there it was ... ugh worst day ever realizing I was 2 hundred plus pounds. I've lived at 252 for the last 8 years and have struggled to get it off.  I've taken 50 pounds off about 2 or 3 times and then somehow got discouraged and gained it back. 

I talked about WLS forever but hubby was against it and now he is my biggest supporter.  After 3 years of going back and forth with it we finally agreed that it was time.  The whole preop thing took about 6 months and I was terrified.  Every step closer I kept feeling like i was going to back out.  I was scared of failing at this but somehow pushed thru those feelings.  I never thought that I would be able to get this far but here I am!

 So if you're reading this and are going thru these same emotions keep pushing its so worth it! Once I was banded I never looked back and I don't allow those negative thoughts back in my head.  If you want something bad enough you keep trying untill you get it.  I'm going to succeed!  

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

so i'm late to blogland..

Ok so I'm 3month 3 weeks into my band and kept putting off blogging about it but today is the day!  I came home sat down and decided to start typing. 

Ok so i got banded June 3rd 2011 and am 45lbs down.  I've realized I'm a slow loser...hey at least I'm a loser :).  It hasn't been easy at times it seems like its a never ending diet but i didn't expect this to be my magic wand ... poof fat be gone! Wouldn't that be wonderful but lets face it in order to get results you have to put in the work so that is what I'm doing.  My commitment to myself is to make this happen no matter how long it takes. So won't you join me in my journey and watch this fat melt away i need all the support i can get :).